Being Strong

living a christian life may not be an easy path for a person..
i used to be a bubbly, cheerful and full of fun person..
as age creeping up, so does my character and tend to think more before i act..
i used to think that working life is a bliss..where we just work and earn money..
i realised it is more than just a bliss..
i need to face wif all sorts of office politics..
i always thought working wif the government will be easy..actually it is not..
partly was my fault..i was too self conscious and lack of self confidence..
right from the start, i knew i was not welcome..
i am not part of the group..
i dont think and act the same manners like my colleagues and even wif the management..
when i first join, the government i thought it would be fun..
then i realised working wif the private sector, is much better..no doubt the risk of getting retrenched and being fired by your boss would be there, but it is much better than working wif the government..
in the government, the weaker group will be bullied..i guess i am in the weaker category..mainly because i am too quiet..i prefer to work and instead of acting high and mighty..and doing all the "taichiss" and bossing people around..
perhaps i am not "cut out" to be a leader..i am more an assistant rather than a leader..
my only consolation right now in facing my working life is to pray the Rosary and Divine mercy wif my family..deep down, i dont like my work anymore..its no longer enjoyable..its more like i'm forcing myself to work and waitin for the time to pass faster..