just another day..

how do u deal if u keep on hearing voices inside u?? and worse still if the voices is manly instead of women or girly voices..
wat if ur hobby is singing ? and the thought of singing now make u cold feet as u can sense that the manly voice will suddenly booming out so loud..
i guess it really can make u feel self conscious..u may wonder wat people may think of u and why does this lady voice sounded like Man..hmmmmmm....
kind of tiring to think n moaning or whining about it rite?? just deal wif it and try to ignore the stupid voices inside me..
nowadays getting lazy to argue wif my mom..i can sense she knows something but she does not wan to let me know..even my best fren..n those around me..perhaps it is better for me not to know and to let me keep on guessing for myself..of coz i will never understand..hahahaha..i will only think and wonder and hoping things will get better...
to regret or not to regret?? do i ever feel regret for losing my virginity so early at the age of 21 wif stupid man who does not even have any good future?? i dont know..i guess i met a bunch of losers throughout my young life..and i fall into temptations and lust..but who cares..its just a part of growing up i guess..and people are boring too..once in a while a bit of excitement to spice up your life..those lovely and romantic memories to cherish but not the stupid and hurtful..
i have so many thoughtss...kind of weird..all the thoughts tat i have on certain people..tat does not mean tat i wan to marry them..just a feeling i guess..harmless innocent feeling..hahahahaha :)
at least now i know i don have to jump to any men to sleep wif them..just think shud b enuff...coz i cant erase those memories..it keep on playing on my mind..everything is like in a circle..round and round..its been 7 months..i dont know for how long..just hope it wont bring me down..
oh ya..not forgetting now face stretching is my hobby..always force myself in front of mirror to smile..even sometimes u have nothing to smile..
people say to cry is to let go..but for me..i have let go too much...now my turn to smile..and enjoy day after day wat i am goin to face..
and its natural for tears to fall down i guess especially when ur sleepy, drowsy or watch tv or stare at computer for way too long...
watever i do, i try to keep myself logic..there is no way we can judge a person..we dont even know how heaven or hell look like..all i know is i am born in tis world..and a lot of adventures i have been facing since baby..been naughty since young :P..